Monday, October 3, 2016

Surrendered Motherhood

   I've started reading a book about being a Mom. It speaks about how being a mother is such a minimized role in society. The title doesn't get the respect or recognition that it deserves. If someone were to ask you what you did for work and you said "I am a Mother." you might be snubbed or get looks of pity. So most of us just quietly say "Oh I'm just a Mom.." or "I don't do anything..". Sometimes you'll catch yourself saying "I'm a Mom....but...but... I do a couple other things on the side!" as if being a Mom isn't enough. 

   Don't get me wrong, I've gotten lots of reassurance and good uplifting comments. For some reason I still feel apologetic about my role. I feel insecure and worried about my contribution to this world. Am I enough? Am I doing enough? How can I be fulfilled when I have NO LIFE. 


   I want to encourage myself and other mothers to feel proud and realize how much we actually do. We are raising HUMANS. Somehow we take care of more than one LIFE. How we parent will shape the entire future of our society. Will it be full of narcissistic, self serving jerks or will it be full of loving, understanding, and open minded peacemakers? Of course there is always nature vs. nurture. We can't be in charge of our children's choices once they are grown. But we can influence them in so many ways. 


 Now that is a huge weight to carry. I know so many mothers who carry that weight so gracefully. I feel like I'm more of a "stumble uphill and fall off a couple cliffs on the way up" kind of Mom. But I make progress. I'm learning to love and embrace it. And it's funny, the more I embrace it and take time to enjoy it, the more time I have for just me. And I need that time to reset and move forward happily. I think as we remember that these are people with souls and thoughts and feelings it will come more easily. We can surrender that need to control and perfect and instead love and accept. 

   Motherhood is a gift. We have the gift to create others with our bodies. Those who can't can take on and mentor the children of others who weren't up to it at that time in their life. Aunts, sisters, grandmothers, teachers, friends. We can all mother those around us. Let's not forget that children are people. They aren't test scores or tasks to be completed. They are souls. It's a big job but it's somehow easier and more joyful to be a surrendered mother. I still get back to that place where I want to run away and I can't handle it and everyone is fighting and I want to screeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaammmmm! But then I send everyone away to take a minful moment, and I do too. I remember peace. I remember myself. I remember that I am a mother. I am strong and capable. I am enough. I can teach and cook. I can bathe and wipe. I can lead and guide. I can step back and allow imperfection. I can police when necessary. I can protect and love. I can be safety in a frightening world. I can take breaks and feel good about that because I am using my other time wisely. 

   To all the Moms out there. You are crazy awesome! It is hard enough just being a woman in this world. So even if you're just feeling mediocre and living bedtime to bedtime I hope that you'll feel your worth. It's right there on the inside. Unearth that awesome lady and take her back! Treat her to days that she can take care of herself and just be alone with herself. :)


Thursday, July 24, 2014

Maternity Shoot with the Hardy Photography Team

Did a little photo shoot with the Hardy Photography Team yesterday. They turned out wonderful, elegant, bright, and beautiful. I did victory rolls in my hair and so it has a fun vintage feel. But still had unique and modern poses. Which I of course love. They were the cutest couple team ever. She was all sass and fire and knew exactly how to position us. He has the talent behind the lens. Perfect pair, those two. Anyway to my favorites of the pictures of my bump holding our little Edulaide Prinsloo. 

Thursday, July 3, 2014

6 Months and NO SHAMPOO.

So I read a blog about a woman who hasn't washed her hair in like 3 years. She said she tried the baking soda+vinegar thing at it didn't work for her. It had been working for me until I bleached out my hair and put color in. Yeah not the best idea health wise. But after that the baking soda vinegar thing was NOT working.

 So I'm going to try this ladies method except in my own way. She says she just does nothing except rinse it with water. I'm actually still washing my scalp. Sometimes I just scrub it really hard with my fingers or I was just sometimes using my husbands crappy body soap which is probably full of junk anyway too and it was leaving an awful residue behind. So my hair was/is feeling quite nasty.

I was feeling like giving up but someone recommended Castille soap and swears that it leaves no residue. So I've ordered it. I will update on how the Castille works. I bought Dr. Bronner's.

Sooo anyway.....after hearing about castille I've decided to take a six month challenge to not wash my hair with shampoo. And wash it with castille a couple times a week. If the castille doesn't work I'll just try the water rinsing and deal with the greasiness. The lady in the blog claims it takes a few months for your hair to adjust. I'm giving it six. So December 2014 We will see where I am at then!

How is my hair doing after a week or two of the no shampoo? It is greasy and full of soap residue. It doesn't smell bad but it doesn't smell good. I can tell that my head feels different and that bugs me. It's hard not to be able to run my hair through freshly clean, stripped hair and conditioned hair. BUT it is much easier to do victory rolls. Like a million times easy. My pin-up hairstyles are such a breeze. When before they took tons of time and tons of freeze spray. So I'm digging that part. I'll check back in soon! And the photo below is what my hair looks like today.

Thursday, June 26, 2014

100 Days of Real Food

I've been following the blog 100 Days of Real Food. I'm really glad I found it. I feel like I'm already even more hardcore then she is in some areas but this blog has helped me with some thing I struggled with. BREAKFAST and DESSERT. I've just been feeling that on my journey to eating healthy I couldn't drop cereal because what else are we supposed to eat and I didn't have any good, healthy ideas for dessert. So I just kind of stuck to lunch and dinner. The problem is that if you slack in any area you so easily slide back into old habits. I kept doing this over and over! I feel now that I'm being consistent with healthy food choices and I'm not roller coastering it. I'm learning that you can make some really yummy healthy things. And that breakfast can be an anti-cereal breeze. All in all I am really happy with this blog. I alter her recipes all the time to fit our families needs and also what ingredients I have available at the moment. But I think that's the idea anyway. We are all at different levels with our eating habits. It's her inspiration and her basic recipe ideas that are what keep me plugging away at this. So what if a few ingredients are different?

Thursday, June 12, 2014

Blue Victory Rolls

Just thought I'd post another picture of my awesome hair since I actually took the time to do it today. One of my victory rolls went a little wonky, but I like it anyway.

Saturday, June 7, 2014

Bunny Eats

The man had his second experience learning to butcher rabbits today. He was pretty quick and efficient. It's good because we just bought a home with space for a whole bunch of rabbits! Making some crock pot rabbit right now. Feels so strange that they were alive this morning and now a couple are cooking for dinner tonight.

Tuesday, June 3, 2014

Mermaid Hair

I got me some mermaid hair for summer! Done by Joey at Headlines.